American Reunion (Jon Hurwitz, Hayden Schlossberg) 2012

Before I start I just have a question; aren’t reunions kind of an outdated oncept nowadays?  Granted I lead a sheltered life and I don’t have many of the same experiences or I don’t have “friends“ but just hear me out.  I figured the appeal of reunions were to see people you haven’t seen in high school right?  Well, doesn’t the advent of things like Facebook utterly kill that notion now.  You don’t need to wait ten years or fly back to your home town or do anything extravagent.  You can contact (or stalk someone on their profile) whoever you want; whenever you want.  Just a thought.  Anyway…

Now I’ve had the “pleasure“ of seeing all the American Pie movies (exlcluding the DTV shite) for one reason or another.  Unlike most movie series, the American Pie movies to me never had a real rise or fall in quality.  Each one felt like generic/meh/amusing entertainment mainly because they were all the same movie.  There wasn’t really much experimentation with these films so I guess it wasn’t a huge shocker that Reunion feels like every other Pie movie before it.  The only thing that has changed is time and oddly enough, that made a difference in how I saw the humor.

You see the way I understood it, the sex humor of American Pie worked (for lack of a better term) because it was about inexperienced teens humiliating themselves in their quest to learn about sex.  Most of the kids in that movie never saw a boob so you got the awkwardness when Jim prematurely ejaculated or when Finch spent a night with Stiffler’s mom.  Sex is an embarassing and exciting subject at that age so it follows you have some goofy shenanigans that ensue.  When a person is 31 however, sex isn’t all that new or embarassing (at least for most and isn’t at all for some twenty something nerd who writes a blog about movies when he could be dating and I’m so lonely I’M SO LONELY I CAN’T STOP I CAN’T STOP!)  Okay, I’m better.  So Jim sees porn when Michelle isn’t around.  So what? So what if Stiffler’s mom is still on the prowl?  It is no longer this high school sex fantasy; it’s just dating.   It’s really hard to come up with raunchy sex humor for a bunch of grown up men who probably know it all now.  The big thing in this movie is that Jim has the opportunity to sleep with an 18 year old but Jim doesn’t want to cheat on Michelle.  You want to know the solution to your problem Jim?  JUST SAY FUCKING NO!  I’m sorry, I’m flying off the handle more than usual.  It’s just seeing Three’s Company humor kind of sends me in a rage lately.

Speaking of age being the enemy of this movie, I have a problem with the characters of this movie now.  You would figure in a movie like this it would be about the characters learning to let go of the past and becoming responsible adults.  You would think that, but it’s not really handled.  I mentioned in my Project X review that I believe what happens in high school means fuck all for who you are in the rest of your life.  In the case of this movie, all these characters peaked in high school and cannot get out of thinking about the “glory days“.  Of the times I had to stop and think about this movie, it got a tad depressing.  You are seeing a group of people in their 30’s who cannot stop living their high school memories.  It’s rather pathetic that these people haven’t done anything in the past 13 years they think is so much better than their pie fucking days.  Wow.

The plot is a mish mash of sub plots about the gigantic cast all doing something.  Stiffler has an uninteresting job, Jim and Michelle don’t have an interesting sex life, and Oz still has the problem of having no personality.  Seriously, it’s been four movies and Oz is still as interesting as a Senate hearing on CSPAN.  Everything works out as predictibly and as dull as ever with no major conflict or tension.

I swear I want to be fair to this movie.  Every once in a while this movie would remember to do something funny whether that ben letting Eugene Levy on set, having Stiffler do something stupid, or maybe the writers would wake up out of their coma every 5-10 minutes.  I will admit I laughed a few times during this movie and I never flat out hated it.  This isn’t a movie I would watch again nor would I recommend it.  I’m saying this movie didn’t piss me off and made me chuckle sporadically.  Take that for what its worth.

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