Glee The 3D Concert Movie (Kevin Tancharoen) 2012

This is the second time in two weeks where I have screwed up a box office bomb review.  I thought I did my due research in finding out that Glee bombed at the box office when I put this movie in my movie queue.  However upon finishing the movie and looking at my sites to get the numbers to write it down another one factored in more overseas numbers pushing it to my cut off limit of double its budget.  That means I A: wasted my time B: should do more thorough research before putting it in my queue and C: I don’t need a “C“ I am wasting my time watching and reviewing a Glee concert movie.  So because I can’t seem to go a week without doing something embarassing, you can read my review of Glee.

Now to complete the humiliation of having to review this I have to make a confession.  I like Glee.  In fact, it is one of the few current shows I regularly watch.  Those statements are sure to have many a head shaking in horror because short of Twilight, Glee seems to bring out some of the more viscious bile on the Internet.  And honestly, I have no idea why.  Don’t get me wrong, I can understand why people would not like the show.  I can easily understand it not being to their taste, but to hear some people bitch its as if the show teabagged their grandmother while setting your house on fire or something.  I’ve read several threads and discussions and I still have no idea why it brings on the hate.  One of the most common things I hear is hate over the creator Ryan Murphy.  Apparently he comes off as arrogant and thinks he is doing some great service to humanity/music and that rubs people the wrong way.  I say this in rebuttal; I DON’T CARE.  I don’t care if David Simon were the biggest asshole in the world, it doesn’t change the fact The Wire is pure awesome.  I don’t care if Christopher Nolan were the most egotistical vain man alive it doesn’t change the fact to me The Dark Knight is a movie orgasm.  I don’t care that Sean Penn is very vocal about his opinions on matters because the man is a phenomenal actor.  I don’t know why people get so hung up on what actors/directors/whatever do or why it should affect their art.    The art is seperate from the man (or woman) who works on it.

And now that I’ve played devil’s advocate for the past few half page or so,  let me go back to devil’s prosecutor.  This is one of the most shallow money grabs I’ve seen in a while.  A question that always has to be asked when you make a movie from a TV show is “What are you selling me that I can’t already get for free on television?“  Sometimes we get an extension or a conclusion to a show that has run its course (Sex and the City, Serenity, etc.) and sometimes it is a story that couldn’t be done on TV for budgetary reasons (The X-Files).  In any case the promise of a television show turned movie is that you are getting more than you would for free TV.  In the case of Glee The 3D Concert Movie, we are getting much less.  You see, in the TV show we actually get a plot and characters along with our music.  In the concert movie, not only do we cut out all that crap about plot and characters, but how about we now charge 3D ticket prices for a 70 minute movie?  How bout a big heaping helping of go fuck yourselves 20th Century Fox?

Now that being said, this movie is exactly what you would expect from a film titled Glee The 3D Concert Movie.  It is the cast of Glee singing some of the hits from the TV show during a concert tour aka the cast working off its indentured servitude contract with Fox.  Now granted I didn’t spring for the full 3D experience however I have no idea why the 3D would be interesting in this movie.  There is no messing around with the depth of objects ala Hugo or even the cheap tactic of just shoving things in your face.  It is shot like a standard concert pic.  In order to get this movie to wheeze past and die the finish line of an exhausting 70 minutes we get some small vignettes about real life fans and how their lives have been changed by Glee.  Whoopde fucking do.

Most of my problems with this is probably due to the fact this was released in theaters.  Had this been some hour long special they aired during sweeps week (or whenever I don’t care) I wouldn’t really care.  I’m sure many people would be casually interested in seeing the stage show and seeing the actors behind the scenes and whatnot.  There is nothing wrong with the product they present.  Its the fact they charge 3D ticket prices for less than what you would get for free TV and all the other reasons I stated which is why this movie SHOULD HAVE been a box office bomb.


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