Timecrimes (Nacho Vigalondo) 2007

DUMBEST TIME TRAVELER EVER!!!

Ahem, sorry, had to get that out of the way.  I’m going to present you with a hypothetical scenario that is not the same as the movie so don’t worry about spoilers or anything.  Let’s say a mad scientist brings you back in time.  He says to you “I’m sorry, everything is going to work itself out but in order to do that you have to do something.  Sit down and don’t do a goddamn thing!”  I don’t know about you but I am not going to be responsible for fucking up the space time continuum.  Our protagonist does so many bone headed and STUPID things he makes Marty McFly look like a pro.

Okay so I heard this movie was like a Spanish Primer and I love Primer so I thought I would love this.  Wrong!  The set up is like this: Hector is moving into his new house with his wife.  Hector notices many strange occurrences and through some weird happenings gets chased through the woods by a trench coat wearing maniac with bandages.  Things get weirder when he stumbles on a lab and gets accidentally sent back in time a few hours.  And crazy shenanigans ensue.

So yeah, Hector is just about the dumbest motherf*cker when it comes to traveling through time as he seemingly does the opposite of what a logical man would do.  This frustrates the f*ck out of you when he tries to fix things again and again.  Also from watching so many time travel movies to even the better Butterfly Effect you can pretty much predict what’s going to happen: Hector messes things up, goes back, makes things worse, lather rinse repeat.  This is just so convoluted and dare I say moronic that its not fun at all.  Skip.

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